Love and Relationships: One good reason why you should marry your true Love

While rounding on my patients yesterday, I walked into the room of my 93 year old patient to behold one of the most beautiful things ever. Her 98 old husband was standing over her, feeding her yoghurt and kissing her on her forehead after she took every spoon. I stood at the door for a minute, watching, in awe of their amazing love. After I interrupted to announce my presence, the husband told me, "She is not eating her breakfast. She doesn't want any of the other things over there (pointing to her tray in the corner). She just wants the yoghurt". I smiled at him. After, I examined her and told them the plan for the day, I walked away from their room still amazed.

The following day, when I came back to see her at 7:30am, he was there. When I asked her if she had had a bowel movement, he responded saying, "No. I would have seen it. I clean her up. I always wipe her up when she is sick and in the hospital." I had to hold back the "Aaaawwwwwwwhhhhh" that I was dying to say. I loved their love! I wanted to probe further. As if he could read my mind, he continued, "We have been married for 70 years, and she has never had any problem going to the bathroom. But she hasn't been eating much, so I guess that is why." As I listened to him, I thought to myself that she must be one of the luckiest women alive. My patient had a condition that had significantly disfigured her. Yet her husband loved her unconditionally.


As I was sitting down and writing my notes, I thought about the elderly couple again. Then I remembered another patient who is 97, her husband is 94 and she was in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). Every morning he would come and sit at her bedside from 7am to 9pm, then he would leave. They never spoke, sometimes he would just sit and hold her hand, all day long. I always noticed that though she was slightly demented she would always light up when she saw him. It was the most amazing thing ever!

Being in my profession, I have seen many instances of the meaning of "true love". Patients with chronic, severe, debilitating conditions, and partners who were there by their bedside through the worst of times. I have also had patients who had spouses that never visited them for one day while they were hospitalized. Today, I couldn't help but pray that my husband would be my true love. Besides the joy of raising our family and growing old together, I would love to be with someone who, when I am gray, wrinkled, debilitated, or sick,  would be by my bedside, and take care of me, just like my patient's husband does her. I would love to do the same.

A lot of people marry for different reasons. If you are going to marry someone just for the sake of being married, out of pressure, because they are beautiful or good looking, or rich, please think twice, because there is a lot that goes on in the institution of marriage that requires a lot more than the above mentioned reasons to sustain the marriage.

If you are married to your true love, I am truly happy for you, because love is such a beautiful thing!